A woman is having trouble with friends who get upset whenever she talks about her travels and accuses her of rubbing it in their faces. She is searching for a solution that will allow her to maintain friendships while still being able to talk about her life and travels.
A Woman Struggles to Balance Her Friendships and Travel
The original poster (OP) starts this scenario by saying that she has been friends with two people since elementary school. When OP discusses her recent travel plans, she is met with negative responses from their friends, who feel that they are “rubbing it in their face.
The OP works hard and lives cheaply to travel and do fun things but feels guilty when discussing these experiences with their friends. They are considering cutting ties due to their friends' negative reactions.
A Difficult Situation
This OP is in a difficult situation as they value their long-term friendship but also want to discuss and share their experiences without feeling guilty.
Some ways to handle this could be to have an open and honest conversation with her friends about how their behavior makes OP feel or to find new, more supportive friends and understand her lifestyle choices.
People Had a Lot to Say
One user said: Most of my friends don't travel, but they know that travel is extremely important to me. I know many people don't want to hear about travel, so if asked or if something is coming up I keep my comments minimal. However, I would have to reevaluate my friendship if I had to always be cautious about what I shared about my life with them. I get excited about the stuff they do that I have zero interest in because I know it brings them joy. I have friends that make more money than me and do travels I wouldn't be able to afford. I still am joyous to see their adventures and hear their stories.”
Another user said: “Good way to put it, and at least it leaves the door open if they want to hear more details of your trip. There are people who travel, and then there are people who are travel snobs and rub it in. We know a couple that can't wait to tell us where they are traveling next and see it as their life mission to do so. These are the type of people that rub it in, and then when their yearly Xmas card/newsletter (brag sheet) arrives, they have a two-page letter about their trip and nothing else. We aren't the jealous type, and it's not as if we don't travel ourselves, but we also don't do the “rub it in” nonsense either.”
Another user said: “People want to see you do good but not better than them. It's human nature, and it's very true. I'm fairly successful from a family of poverty. I keep my success stories to the bare minimum and usually just share that stuff with other successful friends, even then they don't wanna hear about the really good stuff cuz it might outshine them.”
Another user said: “I have one family member who does this to me. Any time I travel, she makes snarky comments about how I can afford to travel and what a luxury it is. But, she just bought a brand-new car and lives in a very expensive city. Meanwhile, I live well below my means and drive a 20-year-old car in order to afford travel. It's not that she afford it, we just have different priorities; she just doesn't want to hear it.”