When you get to a certain age, it’s only natural that you will have experienced certain things with past partners. These things will include things like new homes and exciting vacations.
So what happens when you’re with your next partner and you suggest going on vacation somewhere that you’ve already been with someone else? Let’s find out from the perspective of a travel forum user (33M) who has just proposed this idea to his girlfriend (26F).
An Issue of Intimacy
The original poster (OP) explains that he wants to go away with his girlfriend this summer and the following winter. He has suggested visiting Italy and Greece in the summer and Australia in the winter.
While these places are fantastic suggestions, OP’s girlfriend has rejected all three of them because she has found out that he went to these places with an ex-girlfriend he broke up with seven years ago.
From her perspective, traveling is an intimate adventure, and she doesn’t want to go somewhere he has already experienced with another woman. So, as a result, she is only willing to go away with him if it’s somewhere that he has never been to with another woman.
From OP’s perspective, this is crazy. They’ve done loads of things together that he’s done with other women, such as going to certain restaurants and going on hikes, and she doesn’t mind, so why is this any different? Their house is the same one he lived in with another woman.
Taking to Reddit, he wanted to find out if there was any way that he could get her to change her mind, as he really wanted to visit these places this year. If nothing else, he wants her to realize this shouldn’t be an issue.
A Childish Attitude
The post attracted a lot of attention, with many people calling out OP’s girlfriend for her unreasonable behavior. The consensus was that she was being petty for the sake of it and that it was a prime case of biting off your nose to spite your face.
One user said: “She’s going to miss out on some amazing experiences if she doesn’t drop this childish attitude,” while another called her actions “very weird.”
OP was also provided with some suggestions on how to make his girlfriend see sense. One suggestion was as follows:
“I think I would try telling her that while you went there with another girlfriend, the experience will be different, and that’s what you’re the most excited about. Explain you want to create new memories in these places and share with her your favorite places from there. If this doesn’t ease her up, I’m not sure what else to do.”
Can you sympathize with OP’s girlfriend’s point of view here, or is there no defending her logic? Would you have a problem going away somewhere with your significant other if they’d have already gone there with an ex? Let us know in the comments.
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