Going on holiday with your friends is a perfectly normal, natural, and healthy thing to do, regardless of whether you are single or in a relationship. So, why is this travel forum user (20M) so uncomfortable about the idea of his girlfriend (24) going away with one of her best mates and their group of friends? Let’s find out.
An Issue of Gender?
The original poster (OP) explains that his girlfriend plans to go on a vacation with one of her male friends and his big group of buddies and that he isn’t happy about the prospect of it. While he says he trusts his girlfriend, his insecurity about her going away with male friends suggests otherwise.
OP says that he isn’t close at all with the friend in question and has only met him on a handful of occasions. While he thinks he is “alright” on the whole, his girlfriend’s behavior around him has sometimes irked him.
Previous Concerns
The last time they went out with him, OP’s girlfriend got quite drunk, and the night ended with the two of them walking around arm in arm and dancing as if he wasn’t there. Now, she is planning on going away for his birthday, and OP is concerned about the idea of her getting drunk with him while he isn’t around.
He says that he completely trusts her when she’s sober but openly admits that he doesn’t when she’s had a drink. He doesn’t want to tell her to stop drinking, and she enjoys it, and she wouldn’t listen to him even if he suggested that.
Taking to a discussion forum, he wanted to know how he could best broach the subject with his girlfriend.
The Travel Forum Sounds Off
The comments section was split on their thoughts in relation to the situation. One popular suggestion came from people who thought OP would be better off breaking up with his girlfriend considering he can’t trust her when she’s had a drink. One user said:
“If she is prone to cheating under alcohol, is aware of her tendencies, yet refuses to stop drinking socially, then you should look for someone better. This isn’t a rare problem, but you can’t make her what she is not.”
Others Chime In
Others believed that he wasn’t being a little bit too paranoid and drew on their own experiences. One person said: “I kind of am your gf in relation to being more social when I drink and touchy-feely, but it would never lead to cheating. She may be like me, but that’s something you have to figure out.”
Others believed that regardless of whether OP’s girlfriend went on the trip or not, the problems in the relationship would just be kicked further down the road due to her drinking tendencies. One user said:
“You can talk to her and tell her how you feel about it. But honestly, if you don’t trust her when she’s drunk (based on what you’ve witnessed) and she likes to get drunk, I’m not sure how this can really be resolved. Even if she doesn’t go on this trip, she might drink with her girlfriends at a bar and meet someone.”
If OP doesn’t trust his girlfriend, should he just break up with her? Or is there another way to resolve this situation? Let us know what you think in the comments.
